Oh no they didn't

Best thing I got for Christmas (besides some very nice, very classy striped-green pajamas — the kind Nick Charles wears while enjoying his breakfast martini) was the Superman Ultimate Collector's Box — “ultimate” and “collector's” are ridiculously overused descriptors in the world of DVDs these days, but not so in this case.

The 14-disc set includes two versions each of Superman and Superman II; theatrical versions of Superman III, IV, and Superman Returns; 17 Superman cartoons from the 1940s (including all 9 of the exceptional Fleischer shorts); George Reeves in Superman and the Mole-Men; three full-length documentaries (all Superman fans should see Look, Up in the Sky! The Amazing Story of Superman — it's 2 hours well spent); plus tons of the usual “making of” features, tributes, outtakes, yadda yadda yadda.

I doubt I would ever have bought this set for myself, which is what makes it such a great gift to receive. I'm having a great time rewatching these movies (well, I haven't gotten to stinker-royale Superman IV yet — Superman III is barely salvageable, thanks to Annette O'Toole's endearing performance as Lana Lang).

But, the point I'm trying to get to:

This afternoon I'm flipping around on TV and ABC Family is showing Superman. So (as if I'm not already immersed in this stuff), I watch about 20 minutes — Superman saves Lois, catches a cat burglar, pulls a cat out of tree, rescues Air Force One. Then he takes Lois on a personal flying tour of Metropolis/Manhattan. All of a sudden, the music jumps noticeably. They cut something. And I think I know what it is, but can't believe it.

So, I load up my new DVD and rewatch the scene, uncut. And sure enough, at the point where the music jumped, Lois and Supes fly past the Twin Towers. It's about a 2-second scene as they pass the World Trade Center on their way to the Statue of Liberty. And ABC Family cut it out.

I'm totally flummoxed. ABC Family left in the references to Lois's underwear, and even left in her line “How big are you... er, how tall are you?” But they took the time to cut out 2 seconds of the Twin Towers passing by in the background. They aren't even in focus.

They also trimmed the “mouthful of peanuts” line from the Air Force One cockpit (a 1978 Jimmy Carter joke). Apparently, in the bewildering minds of the ABC Family standards enforcers, the Twin Towers never existed — and a Democrat was never president.

Good thing I have these movies on DVD.