We're gonna need some more FBI guys, I guess...

Late news (2 weeks old)... but I only just heard: Paul Gleason died on May 27, only 3 weeks after being diagnosed with a rare and particularly nasty type of lung cancer.

That's Paul Gleason as in the inept Deputy Police Chief from Die Hard (“Oh, I hope that's not a hostage”); the sinister “fixer” from Trading Places (who ends up as a gorilla's caged love-slave); and of course, always and forever, Vice Principal Dick Vernon from The Breakfast Club (“Don't mess with the bull, young man — you'll get the horns”).

Before he turned to acting, Gleason played college football with Burt Reynolds, was a AAA ballplayer for many years, and was drinking buddies with Jack Kerouac — details that all seem strikingly out of character for a guy who played so many men-with-sticks-up-their-asses.

His cocky swagger was unparalleled — definitive, really. And he always gave the stupidest lines a devastatingly straight delivery (“The next screw that falls out is gonna be you”).

By the early 90s, he didn't even have to speak... he was funny on sight. He'd enter the room, and the whole audience would share an oh-no-not-THIS-guy moment. Someone would mutter “I'm crackin' skulls,” and the chuckling would begin. The only other character actor I can think of who pulled that off was John “Double-Secret Probation” Vernon.

Our loss. Detention will never be the same.