The Old Man has gone to his Major Award

The Old Man: Would you look at that? Would you look at that?!
Mother: What is it?
The Old Man: Why, it's a leg!
Mother: But what is it?
The Old Man: Well, it's... a leg! You know, like a statue!
Mother: Statue?
The Old Man: Yeah, a statue!
Ralphie: Yeah, a statue...
Mother: Ralphie!
Narrator: My mother was trying to insinuate herself between us and the statue.
The Old Man: Holy smokes! Do you know what this is? This is... a lamp!
Narrator: It was indeed a lamp.
The Old Man: Isn't that great? What a great lamp!
Mother: I don't know...
Narrator: The Old Man's eyes boggled... overcome by art.
Mr. Parker: Oh wow! It's... it's... it's indescribably beautiful! It reminds me of the Fourth of July!

Darren McGavin, I drink to your leg.